


Stories Need Telling

by OrangeZest100



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-12
Updated: 2013-03-12
Packaged: 2017-12-05 03:33:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/718396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OrangeZest100/pseuds/OrangeZest100
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I wrote Samifer narrative poetry about their relationship in some sort of au setting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stories Need Telling

Not much of a poet,

But I’m not one for words either

And stories need telling

The medium doesn’t matter;

And maybe it’s too difficult,

Like staring at the sun,

But it’s a story that needs telling nonetheless

So let’s get it running.

 

Maybe the beginning is the place I could start,

A foot on the ground to jump off from.

Hate and distrust

Bitter and better that what I felt for myself.

It shouldn’t be so easy

For you to read my mind, but inside

My skull you came during sleep and

Plucked all my dark secrets to woo me to your side.

I said no, and I kept saying no.

I had no desire to change that.

 

Somehow a change, from

Stalking in the dark, to comfortable silence.

No shrill arguments to fill my head,

Tire me for my job and my duty,

Fill me with dread.

Comfortable silence or complete lack of contact reign.

Dean notices, so does Cas,

The dark circles of my eyes no longer present

Able to rest.

 

Then it got lonely, in the dark

And I have never dealt well with loneliness;

Last time I fell in love with a girl,

And she ripped me to pieces, only

To hand me to you.  But

You know that, so does everyone else

And Dean still brings it up, like part

Of a checklist I can’t control and don’t know the qualifiers for.

You never gave me a list.

 

Maybe this is why, deep in my mind

Or maybe it’s my heart or maybe my soul,

I ask you to visit again.

You sit closer this time, next

To me instead of across the room,

Hands in your lap, next to me

On the bed.

I just sigh, because maybe this is nicer

Than either of us will admit.

 

I wonder, in the car

Or in the diner, whether you’ll

Speak to me again someday.

The words you’ll speak, the tone you’ll use,

I wonder if you’ll ask for “yes”.

But you don’t speak that night or the next,

And then it’s simply “why”.

I don’t know how to answer.

 

Maybe I’m just a desperate plea

I have no idea how to stop,

Self-destructive to the point

Of finding the nearest poison

And trying to consume it whole,

With everything I have left.

 

I don’t know when conversation

Became me calling you late at night,

When Dean and Cas were asleep,

Watching a midnight movie to popcorn

And explaining the things you didn’t know;

Or when it became a training session

In torture and ordering hellhounds.

 

I don’t know how courtships work.

Even long ago, in a time better not remembered

I fell more than worked to tie knots

Between her life and mine. So

Maybe that’s why, I don’t

Quite catch it, when we slip into friendship

And then to something more.

 

You’re silent that night,

Inky blackness reaching in, even

Though in my imagination, we could sail the seas.

So it’s silent, tense for the first time since

The beginning.

Do you need the breaths you take?

Or do you simply take them

To remind me to take my own.

 

Your lips are cold.

Your lips are chapped.

Your lips are heaven.

 

They say addicts are

Always addicts, that it’s never over,

That siren call; but

Once I had you, to touch me in the dark,

Whisper the secrets of the skies

Be the iceberg to my raging volcano

I no longer knew what addiction was.

Is it possible to become addicted to a person?

 

I forget you’re not a person though;

Celestial intent wrapped in the meat

Of a depressed man half-mad from sorrow

And grief and loneliness.  You

Offered him absolution in trade

For a capsule for your Grace.

 

I kiss you

Like a drowning man seeks oxygen,

Like birds seek a breeze and dolphins a current,

Like my only lifeline to life itself.

Did I breathe before

 

This

Addiction in love, a messy

Uncoordinated meet and greet.

I should tell them.  Those I know,

Though none better than you.

You should tell them.  That this

Is no longer a search for that “yes”

And call the whole thing off.

 

I wonder if your Father

Would save you

If

I

Asked?

 

Dean doesn’t like it and

They hide me away, but

Nothing can keep us apart,

Like the sea and the land at the coast.

So you find me, whisk me away;

In the moonlight, it’s

Not inky darkness but instead a friendly shadow.

You always brighten up my dark.

 

I’m always afraid to touch,

Like you might disappear if

I try too hard to find you.

You seem equally afraid of

Breaking me into pieces.

I trust you not to break me;

You trust me not to disappear.

 

They find me.

We knew they would.

You cannot keep apart opposite poles of magnets.

 

Somehow,

They don’t kill us.

 

The next time I see you,

You’re at my door.  It

Has been too long, and you

Should be decaying in my sight.  But

You are whole, healthy.

 

You hand me rings

From some horsemen,

Say that blood from three are

On your hands.  One

Offered to do you a favor.

Nick is gone, to visit his girls.

Only you remain.

Healthy.

 

You say

You’re not really

Complete

Without me

There

To finish

Your bowl of popcorn.

 

They don’t believe you.

They hurt you until

I’m crying, crocodile tears from where

They pin me to the floor.  You

Offer them anything so they won’t

Hurt me instead.

 

They ask you to die.

You kindly accept.

As you slip your blade to your chest,

Light surrounds us both.

You fail to bleed Grace into my arms.

You are forgiven.

 

Maybe they’ll forgive me too,

And you; but for now

In the cool blackness,

I have your fingertips,

Your touch,

Your lips.


End file.
